[GOSSIP] Incest Incensed at Cow Boris "Riff Comments"

Crack LA paparazzi spotted Incest in intense "Yeti Film" discussions with Steven Spielberg yesterday at an undisclosed Hollywood restaurant. Concerning Cow Boris' contentious "riff comments," Incest was heard to remark "I'm incensed."

According to our sources, Spielberg plied him for details, seemingly interested in possible subplots for the upcoming, as yet unnamed "Yeti Film."

"When I was in 'Nam with Boris," Incest elaborated, "my riffs saved that boy's life. And this is the thanks I get! We'll see if any Boris riffs show up on the Incest solo debut . . . or even Boris playing Incest riffs!"

Spielberg seemed concerned about a possible Yeti-rift, but Incest assured him all would eventually work out: "My lawyers will have his lawyers' asses for breakfast." Spielberg seemed interested in including the 'Nam incident in the forthcoming "Yeti Film," but wanted to set it in the near future on a faraway planet populated with giant talking ostriches. Incest was heard to respond favorably to this suggestion: "Show me the money!"

[BREAKING NEWS] Cow Boris Working On Long-Awaited Solo Album

The solo-album that Cow Boris began almost 4 years ago, "Human Head Pizza," has resumed recording.

The record includes tracks that will be played by Dead Yeti upon location of their missing drummer, Bookworm.

"I started this record before Dead Yeti got back together a few years back. I played one solo show around that time and showcased a few of these tracks, but they weren't really fleshed out then. I think I played 'Human Head Pizza,' 'You Know Where You Can Put that Meat,' and 'Happy Birthday to Fatty.' I'll have to find the original master tapes of the demos so I can figure out how these songs go again. They are really complex, all in like some crazy 4/4 time, major chords and shit," Boris commented from his Texas studio Wednesday afternoon.

At press time, Boris was just laying down vocal tracks, in hopes of recording the music later.

"I wanted to try something new this time, just sing and then try to put the music to the lyrics. I think it will give the vocals a less constrained, less tainted feel that I think a lot of the Yeti records have been stifled by. Either that or it will be really messy and out of time and key, which a lot of the Yeti records have been stifled by as well. Whatever."

Boris was a little ambiguous when talking about the possible guest appearances on the album.

"I don't want to give a lot away. The whole band might play on it, but most likely it will be just me. The people don't want to hear an Incest riff on a Boris solo album, I can tell you that right now. They either want to hear Boris riffs on Boris albums, or Incest maybe playing Boris riffs on Boris albums. They don't want Boris jams on Incest blings either. Ya dig? I might have this new kid who does what he calls (mouth play) on it; this new kid Goodsy McEnglish might be on the record, but I don't know yet."

Incest has yet to comment on the solo record, but [New Guy] thinks it is good press for Dead Yeti.

"I can't wait until it comes out. It basically just means more songs for us to play, and more product for the fans to enjoy. It's still going to come out on our label, Igneous Rock Music; it's not like he's going Sony on your ass," [New Guy] said.

"Human Head Pizza," the latest Dead Yeti-related release since 1994, should be available in December.
Possible tracks:
- Human Head Pizza
- The Funny Laugh Lemonade
- Happy Birthday (to) Fatty
- You Know Where You Can Put That Meat
- Slip and Slide
- Tracheautomatic Nutball
- If You Love Me, Just Stop
- The Sandwich You Learn to Eat
- Bloodbath Birdcage